My first piece #Iwas15

It’s Been So Long Since Anyone Felt Me intensely…
I Try To Catch it deep Inside…but I Still can’t…
I take a deeper breath and pray that someday a star would
lighten my heart with a sparkle.
I Just miss the Voice Whisper In My ear I love You.
I Wish I Just could Go Back In time..
It Just Seems Harder than I ever thought…
I try to Control My feelings
But I even Fall Into deeper emotions…
Bewilderment of feelings made it even harder…
Crying blood isn’t excruciating no more…
I Lost my self in the search to find my real self…
When Will I run Out Of this Cage…
The Cage Where I drowned My Self With My Own Tears…
The cage that Made Me see the World With Only Smoke and Dust And Dirt
My Soul Is Begging For Help…Asking For Secure that it Had Never Felt Even In the Cage Where No Ones Left.
When Maybe That was The Problem.
That No one Was Left…
They say walk the road till the end… You’ll always find the light.
What if you don’t know what road to take…
Lived Suffering all Along…And Still the sullen heart Is Still Beating…
Will it last So long?…Will the aching end?
Will My soul isolate my brooding body that Suffered From distress and grief …
I wish I could Fly Over the scenery of Oceans and seas…high above the acres…Over the clouds to the ecstasy…Where Flowers hearts and butterflies are found…

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Who would’ve known #Stab

But if you haven’t been deeply stabbed ..How would you have ever known how to build an empire within the self of yours..

Where things fall and rebuild .. 

Where feelings come and go .. 

Where you see the cruelty of the deprived.. 

The hungry translate the need with the same taste of bitterness that they were raise and used to inhale..

How would you have known that a stab ..

Aches and hurts ..

It could kill .. 

but a stab also reshapes ..

It reshapes your heart ..

To stay strong is to fight for the healing ..

Surviving with bruises makes you a warrior..

An injured warrior makes you a better fighter ..

With a the experience of forgiving ..

That makes you see life with an open heart..

Your damaged heart will be your weapon ..

Who would have known a stab would do all of that..

#stab

She was extraordinary 

She deals with cards as a meditation..A meditation to find her own-self ..

She doesnt play to win the game..

She plays to explore .. 

The smell of dirt on every card reminds her of every story untold ..

A life lesson learned ..

She never plays by the rules ..

She sets her own rules ..

She was extraordinary 

She has eyes that glow in the darkest nights .. 

A smile that lights up dark skies ..

 She deals to find answers ..

She never deals for the money ..

She has wisdom that weighs a million lifetimes lived..

The Sacred treasure of chance ..

How numbers lead to fate..

How threat of the outcome leads her to revered eternity..

Whether through fog and dust or dead sea crystal waves .. 

May she dance her way through..

Patience #havefaith

A minute before the sun was about to peak ..She sighed and said : “ill never see the sunrise again.. ”

Her pain stood right Infront of her .. 

Gazed deeply at her .. As it drifted tears of her silent agony.. 

Her silence spoke a million word

If only somebody could’ve heard ..

She smiled and said : “ill come back tomorrow “. 

A letter to the man who broke my heart

I hope one day when you are in your happiest days of your life..Your daughter runs to you breaking down between your arms.Choking with her innocent tears..

Asking you :

” Why dad ..?!

Why does love hurt so much ..?!

Why me daddy ??

Why am I hurting this bad ?!

Where did i go wrong ..?!

And ..

What have I done to deserve the pain I’m feeling now? 

I feel so broken that it actually burns on every breath that i take .. 

He watched me suffer infront of his eyes and never spoke a word.

He never gave me an answer ..

He never asked me to leave..

All he did was give me promises ..

And begged me with his tears to stay..

He gave me hope that he’ll come back

And that ill always be his only savior..

Who saves him from his misery

And the worst part was that i believed him ..

ill never let go, dad.”

Every tear of hers is gonna shatter your heart to bits and pieces..like a stabbing knife on every tear running down her beautiful face .. And You.

You will have Nothing to say to her.

You ll just gona feel guilty because you weren’t able to protect her ..

Years might pass.. And you ll still gona walk to her room in the middle of the night to find her drowned in her innocent tears.. Heartbroken .. Because a heartbreak would last forever .. 

She might get over him .. 

She might be strong enough to pretend that shes Okay ..

She might turn out to seem as heartless as her dad.

But shes not gonna be okay ..

Because some incidents happen to us ..

Its impact would be so strong that it changes us as humans ..

Shes gona feel like she wants to go back to her old self ..

But she not gonna be able to.. 

Shes gona be too scared that nothing would ever be able to protect her.

not even you her father

And When that day comes by .. 

Remember me.. ­čÖé